Anyone can be nice to someone. Anyone can be helpful and courteous, but not everyone knows how to properly be rude. Why would we want to be rude? Here at ‘Monday’ you know we take the path of least resistance. It’s much easier to be rude than to be nice to someone. Not everyone can do it with skill. So here I will show you some ways you can be properly rude, so that people won’t bother you. You don’t always want people bugging you and sometimes there isn’t a good way to be nice about wanting them to leave you alone.
Here I present how to be rude to people:
- Firstly, raise your voice a lot and be very demanding. Some people find this very rude.
- Never go along with anyone and always rebel in a decision. Then when they don’t agree with you yell at them for not going your way.
- Take everything personally. If someone is ignoring you or makes some comment take it as a personal attack and let them know. Even though they may not be intending to be rude to you, you can certainly be rude to them back!
- Name calling is great. Be sure to pick something that you can use to exaggerate, for instance, their weight, or their nose or the fact that they wear glasses.
- Yell at them if everything is not perfect, and if it is, then yell about the fact that it’s too perfect. This is also very rude.
- Perfect the art of rude hand gestures. A middle finger is a gesticular f-you. In Germany the a ok sign with your thumb and index finger together in a ring, means a-hole — So find out what gestures are rude in other countries so you can gesture rudely to foreigners.
- Swearing is considered rude, especially if you do it at other people. Again learn how to swear in other languages so you can insult them in theirs.
- Never change your behavior even when you know it hurts someone. Make them cry? All the better, you’re here to be rude not to be a nice guy. An exception to this is maybe to know when you might cross the line and not cross it. There’s a difference between being rude and being mean, and we’re not trying to tell you to be mean.
- This one is going to sound counter intuitive but why not learn about social etiquette and manners. If one is going to be rude to people one must know how to be polite. Once you know you shouldn’t put your elbows on the table while holding food, you can put your elbows on the table all the time!
- Treat no one with respect. Not women, not your elders, not people in positions of authority. This is ultimate rudeness.