Category Archives: “UN” Productivity / Time “MIS” Managment

How to be lazy.

by admin

How to pretend like you’re working

Let’s say you’re reading 10 Awesome Internet Time Sinks and the boss walks in. What do you do? The obvious answer is hit the boss key. I don’t know if programs have these anymore but if your browser did you could instantly pull up that spreadsheet and your boss would be none the wiser. Actually I think because you can minimize windows now, that the boss key isn’t as much of a problem. Back in the day you used dos or some other program that didn’t have multiple windows to open so what you had open is what your boss would see. When they made boss keys, then what would pop up is something that looked very business-like, a word processor or the like. These days everyone can minimize windows. That is only one way to pretend like you’re working.

If you’re programming you might put in comments. Can never have too many comments. For those who don’t do any computer programming, comments are just plain text that the computer knows to ignore by a certain character combination on the screen something like the double-forward-slash // or the forward-slash-asterisk /* */ pairs. The need for documenting your program is great, and you should always provide comments when something isn’t clear. However, if you’re just pretending to work you can simply put in tons of comments for everything. Then you look like you’re programming when really you aren’t.

If you’re cleaning the house what you might do is stack stuff and wipe down the most used and frequently seen counters. You’re not doing any real work you’re just stacking, moving stuff around and making it look different. The key is just to make it look different. Put some things from one book case on the other and vice-versa.

If you’re in an office, going to the bathroom a lot might make it seem like you’re working, but you have to be careful to go to the bathroom when the boss is not around and to do it a lot. When the boss is there you’re there at your desk typing away (or whatever it is you do.)

If you’re a stock-boy, why not straighten up some shelves and leave the hard work to someone who really wants to spend the time working.

If you’re writing why not ‘brainstorm’. You would look like you’re preparing to write that best selling novel, but instead you’re just doodling on your notepad. Or surfing the web for “research”.

If you’re a game developer you can play games for research, or better yet, watch a youtube video on the games you want to make without actually working on them.

That’s really all I can think of right now. Of course I don’t really have any authority in this area, having never pretended to work before, I’m just pretending like I know what I’m talking about. Usually I’m just lazy, why pretend to work and just not work.

Until ‘Monday’

by admin

The reverse of timeboxing – Time-Unboxing!

Time-unboxing is a good way not to make any progress on anything.

Well since “I’ll do it on Monday!” is all about not making progress or being productive, I thought I turn a productivity method on its ear. The method is called timeboxing. Timeboxing is a method of setting aside a period of time each day and focusing on one thing to make progress on that one thing. Well the obvious way to unbox it is by not setting a time period. However we need to go further than that.

With time unboxing you need a to-do list. It needs to have some items that were set aside for a period of time, also would be good for things you do every day but don’t necessarily write down because you do them every day for a fixed period of time. Instead don’t spend any particular amount of time on it. Let’s say you clean for 30 minutes every day. But today when you unbox that time, you say okay I won’t set any time limit. Alright so you’re cleaning and it’s been 5 minutes and you’re starting to get bored, tired, or sore. Then just quit. Hey you didn’t keep the house clean today; you just stopped being productive today. Maybe less productive today than you were yesterday.

Okay maybe you have a list of items and want to work 30 minutes each on them. Erase those minutes. Now put more items on the list, everything you can think of. You just created a whole host of items that may never get done! It’s just that easy. So try time-unboxing today because it may mean you never get that project done!

Until ‘Monday’

by admin

How to waste time for fun and profit

What does the word ‘waste‘ mean? Well we’re going to take the verb definition; it is an action word after all. Waste means to use or expend carelessly, extravagantly, or to no purpose. What is time? We’re going to use the noun definition but time is the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole. To put it a little more clearly, time is an arbitrary measurement of the passing of events. Put waste and time together and what do you get? Expending time carelessly or to no purpose. In other words doing stuff for no reason at all for a period of time.

Okay, we’re going to take that last part of the article title off. You don’t get any profit from wasting time. You can’t get your time back, and it won’t produce something useful. At ‘Monday’ this is our favorite past time. Who cares if you have bills to pay, or a loved one to pay attention to, all that matters if that you’re having fun doing nothing. Who cares if you have a presentation to make, let your boss worry about that. He’ll probably fire you, but who cares? You’re having fun. Who cares, it’s only your wedding. It’s only the funeral of the most beloved person in the state. We don’t care, we want to do nothing.

So now that we know what wasting time is, what are some ways we can waste time? Before we get to the most obvious way, I will mention the next most obvious way, which is the internet. I’m not going to get into how you can waste time on the internet because I plan on doing it in a future article entitled “Awesome internet time sinks” but rest assured, go to Google and you can start wasting time right this very minute (well at least wait until you read the whole article before tabbing into Google).

The first most obvious way that we’re getting to as the second on the list is of course the television. Here is something that hardly ever produces anything useful. Sure you have your painting shows and your cooking shows, but let’s face it do you ever paint or cook while watching one of these? Didn’t think so. Oh of course you’re going to say the news. Well you can at least trick yourself into thinking you’re being productive by being “up” on the news. Truth is the news is there for people who don’t want to get involved but would rather comment on society or whatever. Or maybe you just want to know what the weather will be like.

Another great way to waste time is coloring. You’re not learning any new significant art skills when coloring, and most likely you’re an adult reading this. As a child you would color and it might help you in some way, staying in the lines, keeping your brain fresh or whatever. As an adult you had to put away childish things. Well now I’m giving you permission to start playing with childish things again. Coloring is great. Along the lines of that is playing with toys. Go buy some transformers or GI Joe’s. Go ahead it’s okay, I won’t tell anyone you still play with dolls, er, I mean *action* figures.

Reading could be wasting time, if it’s fiction and you’re just reading for enjoyment. Don’t fall in the trap of thinking you’re wasting time by reading technical books or something that teaches you stuff, or biographies. To be sure, with those you are learning stuff. You want to choose books that don’t make you learn, and maybe don’t have any larger vocabulary than a fifth-grader. I’m not exactly advocating you read children’s books however if you follow the above children’s books might be fine. Just remember the point is not to be productive. I believe you can enjoy time wastes though.

I want to address one more that’s actually kind of iffy. That is video games. Sure they can be fun and sure they can’t really do much for your brain, especially if they contain mindless violence, however, they will assist your reflexes. Improve hand-eye coordination. With some motion controllers you can even exercise while playing games. They can also help you learn things. For the most part though video games are for entertainment purposes. So playing a game can be a time waste. Actually you might want to play a game that you don’t like because that could be considered more of a waste of time then something you enjoy.

Well I hope this has given you some ideas on how to waste your time, so until ‘Monday’ keep procrastinating!